Sep. 2nd, 2013 04:37 pm
ezras_cat: (Default)
[personal profile] ezras_cat
I am due to go on holiday for a week next Monday - just a coach trip with mum and I'm *reasonably* sure that she wants to go and is looking forward to it. I'm so far down in my boots I'm actively dreading it- the thought of sharing a room with her for a week, of being surrounded by other people and of being away from my own territory fills me with absolute terror. The thing is that she's worried about me anyway because I had an absolute fit at her house a couple of weeks ago and ended up sobbing on her shoulder; we were supposed to go out for the day yesterday and I just cried off because I couldn't face it; and I know she's really concerned about me. I rang her today and said that if she didn't want to go then I'd be perfectly happy just to spend a few days at her house and go out on a couple of little day trip type things (which I would - I'm more familiar with her house after all, than a strange hotel somewhere), but she said she wanted to go, and I don't feel that I can fight my corner anymore because of the aforementioned worry about me.

But I DON'T WANT TO GO!! I'm absolutely dreading it. If I wasn't in such a state then it wouldn't matter so much, but it's just the thought of it - it's building up in my head now in that way things do when you're in this stae, and I know it's not going to be a success - I'm going to spend so much time putting on a front that I suspect I'll cry like baby every time I step into the shower.

What do I do? How can I tell her that I just can't face it without upsetting her, which is the last thing I ever want to do?

Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?

Date: 2013-09-02 10:28 pm (UTC)
msilverstar: (Default)
From: [personal profile] msilverstar
I'm sure she'd rather have you happy than miserable, that's worth more than a thousand coach trips.


ezras_cat: (Default)

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