Jul. 29th, 2013

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There is quite a lot of Not Good Stuff going on at the moment and I'm seriously starting to think that if I'm not careful I'm going to go headlong into a second nervous breakdown (I like that phrase, it has a nice Victorian ring to it). Been about 15 years since the first, and about 10 years since I had a really bad 'do', but I can feel it coming...

Following on from the weird dream about Sandra, last night involved something else a bit odd. Whilst it's been so hot I've slept without covers on, but I can't just lie there akimbo without some kind of security and so, to be honest, I sleep hugging a pillow. Sad but true. Last night I dreamed that I was walking to work still clutching my pillow for comfort.

I think it's becoming pretty clear that I need to get away from this job asap. I'm beyond exhausted, have work coming out of my ears and have reached the stage of thinking that yes, everybody *is* out to get me. I go home and cry nearly every night just from sheer tiredness. I do, in fact, recognise all the signs of what's going to come. I think the best thing I can do is take some time off sick pretty damn fast (if I can then get over the fact that my colleague will do her damndest to make me feel guilty, or at least that's how I see it in my nicely developing paranoid state).

Ain't the mind a grand thing?

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ezras_cat

January 2014

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